Disdain

I hate my boss.

Seriously. I don't mean I dislike him. I mean, I truly hope he trips on a crack in the sidewalk and falls in front of a bunch of onlookers and rips a hole in his little freaking khaki pants.

I know, bad Catholic, right? Sorry. I am sure I will go to bed tonight, say my prayers and ask God to forgive me, but for know. I hate the man.

The man is truly inept. He has no clue what I do all day (yet pretends to know all). He has no idea how to treat a customer (yet tries to teach me). He has no idea how to manage people (yet he gets paid 6 figures to act like it).

C'mon people. Who lets these people climb corporate ladders anyway? Its like the athelete who makes it through college but never learns to read. What the hell happens?

I have asked him for two weeks now, that I need to speak with him regarding some troubles I am having with my territory. His response? (same as always, I don't know why it upsets me, it is on freaking repeat) "I am so busy, we will talk when you are in the office next." Well, dipshit, I have been in the office three effing times since we spoke and, um, yeah, that's right, we still haven't discussed anything.

I was in the hellhole, oh, excuse me ... I was in theeoffice yesterday since 8:00. He was there most of the day too. He KNOWS I leave at 4:25 in order to get the elevator (our building is so old that a man stands downstairs and pulls rope to bring the elevator up to you ... really, I swear!) and make it to my train in time to get the kids before day care starts to charge $$ for minutes that I am late. So ... this brainiac shows up at my desk at 4 freaking 20 to discuss his time out in the field with me from last week.

Of course, these discussions are never positive, not for me, anyway. My numbers are all below average (well, maybe if my coworkers weren't hanging out in my territory all week, those averages might turn around a bit), I suck, blah, blah, blah.

He asks if I have questions and I think to myself, "OK, asshole. I ask you for all kinds of shit all the freaking time. You sit here and ask me if I have questions. Um, will you answer these questions, or will you tell me that you will have time to answer them in the year 2011?" So, I respond with a terse, no and head off to my train ... which I miss. Fuck.

I know when I chat with my husband about it I will get the world's greatest PC answer (same that I always get). "He is your boss. We need the salary for a while longer. Is there anything that you can change ..... (insert what you want here: elevator music, the 'wah wah wah wah wah wah wah' sounds from Charlie Brown, Seinfeld's 'yadda yadda yadda', etc .... I certainly do).

The fact is. I am busting my fat tail. Seriously. I used to goof around. Putz my day away and wonder why I wasn't cutting it. That all changed. I used to work out in the field a max of three days a week (with the old boss, as long as you were at your goal, it didn't matter WHAT you did, as long as it was done), I now work five. I bring home LESS than 50% of my salary because I have to pay day care for five days a week. I am busting my hump, while coworkers sit around and watch $$ roll in because of their territory or their hook-up with the boss (yes, there is that going on too). I won't do it.

I won't steal or cheat to get my numbers up. I won't stab people in the back to make myself look good. I am better than that. So, if I get fired. Tough shit. Would it be a blow to the ego? Hell yeah. Would hit hurt financially? Right now, yes. But - I would survive.

Do I hate my boss? Yes. I do. OK ..... maybe not hate ...... but please, don't ever ask me to say anything nice about him, because I have nothing ... my mind draws a big flat blank.