"I love you" .....

So .... I just got back from seeing my E .... What a feeling. So happy - yet so sad.

Here is the fill-in:

E was injured overseas ... he hurt his back. They have sent him back to Ft. Bragg for medical treatment and more than likely, he will NOT return to Iraq. BUT - and here is my big BUT - he will NOT be returning home any time soon. From what he tells me, these medical boards and treatments can take 90 days or more ... and they will NOT release him until they fix what they broke. Ugh. So ... we are awaiting word on if he undergoes surgery or rehab or what.

So ... with Big J in Tampa visiting Grandma and Grandpa, we got MIL to watch little j and I headed out to Ft Bragg on Friday to see E.

I left from Ohare early and arrived in Fayetteville around 12:00. I rented a car, since E has been using post transportation this entire time. I knew he would want some time off the base ... and I needed a way to get around as well. I arrived at Ft Bragg with E waiting for me - he had a dozen roses with gerbera daisies attached (my fave), some gummy bears (some of my favorite candy) and an 8-pack of Diet Dr Pepper waiting for me in his fridge. For E to be THIS thoughtful is highly unusual. It was absolutely incredible to see him ... and have him just hold me (without any kids in the mix - I actually forgot I was a Mom for a short time)!

He immediately showed me around the base - this place is HUGE! Unlike what I truly pictured. It was cool b/c I was able to see where he trained, ate, slept ... some places were nicer than others. I was actually disappointed to see some of the places we allow our troops to sleep for weeks on end .... I think prisoners actually get better living conditions than some of these guys!

Friday night we went downtown Fayetteville (what a small town!) and ate dinner at a bar & grill. It was great to actually sit down and have a glass of wine with my husband on a Friday night! I felt like a lady again ... not just "mom."

On Saturday we SLEPT IN!!!! I woke up at 9:30!!!!! Can you actually believe that! It was heavenly ... not only to wake up whenever I wanted - but to be next to Eric again. We went to late breakfast and then he drove me out to the FOB (forward operating base). This is the place that he stayed for a few weeks, training for war. It is created to simulate life in Iraq. It was really neat to see - and hard to imagine my husband having to endure things like all of this. It was cool - yet scary at the same time.

We wandered around the PX and sat in the room and watched the Cubs game. That evening we got cleaned up and had a romantic Italian dinner downtown. It was so great.

On Sunday he took me to the Post chapel for church and we went out for Sunday brunch. We ate WAY too much but really enjoyed ourselves. That afternoon we went to the Special Forces Museum in Fayetteville. It was really neat to see the history behind these guys. What jobs they do ... and the things we, as Americans, take for granted on a daily basis. The next person that complains about war, politics, etc ... let them jump into a uniform and see what America REALLY is all about.

Because we ate such a heavy brunch we weren't really hungry until late. When was the last time just E and I went driving around looking for somewhere to go for dinner at BEDTIME?!?!?? It was so much fun. We stopped at a BBQ joint and had a great time.

Monday morning was bittersweet since I knew I had to leave that afternoon. We skipped breakfast and slept in, once again. We went to the PX to get something for Big J and an Army wife mug for me. It was hard to not get swept up in the "excitement" (is that the word I am really looking for?) of it all. Being on base, around soldiers, seeing my husband and all that he went through .... it made me very proud (maybe for the first time) to be an "Army Wife" ... I have always always been proud of E ... but never really thought of myself as an "Army Wife."

We went out to a Sports Bar on base for lunch ... played a mean game of air hockey and then went back to the room and prepared to leave. It was so hard. He is home .... but not home. He feels like he let down his Unit by not being back there and has to fight that demon, every day, all by himself. He knows that is children and wife sit back and go on with their lives without him while he waits on people to control his future life.

As much as I was all "hoorah" for the Army ... I am a bit pissed with them as well. Take care of my husband and then bring him home. Don't let him sit and sit and sit ..... what good does it do anyone????

Leaving was awful. I hugged him as hard as I could and drove away. I received a text about 15 minutes later .... "I LOVE YOU" .... I cried.

And now ... I am back in the hell hole that I call an office ... dealing with the same bullshit I deal with every time I am here ...and I want to scream at them all for not giving a shit about anyone else but themselves. Ugh ..... I miss E badly.