Random thoughts and a bunch of etc, etc, etc.

Why is it that the small things drive E nuts ... but when it comes to relaxing with small things, he doesn't get it????

Why do my children insist on whining incessantly ... I mean ... ALL the effing time? Why?

Why are guys assholes? Why is it that they think they are centers of the universe. Don't think your assholishness won't come back to bight you in your ass!!!!!!!

It is cold here still. Shit. It really is. I am sick of it. Sick.Of.It. Al Gore - you are an idiot.

Easter is coming. Easter is a CHRISTIAN holiday. Yes, I know we forget that ... because in the "PC" world it is about bunnies, candy and egg rolling. But, why the eff id Obama the Antichrist insisting on turning the White House Egg Rolling Contest into an effing Gay Pride event. I hate him. I do.

Why can't I have the life I used to have with this job? Gone 3 days out of the week. Work from home 2 days a week. Boss was supportive. People were considerate. Now I am go- go - go 5 days a week ... the pay doesn't equal the job and the boss is ignorant. Yippee.

I go to the doctor tomorrow. We are going down the next avenue for this weight struggle. 3 months since the last visit and 0 .... ZERO ... pounds list. Ugh.

How long are they going to keep sending the synpathy/ pc votes coming in for Scott on AI ... OK - so he is blind. That is no biggie ... but it gave me the creeps yesterday when he was singing and he just looked crazed. Seriously.

E is on the home fix it warpath .... while I am happy about this; my house is in utter chaos. Things everywhere. Tools on my dining room table. Chair rails off the walls and on the floors. Furniture piled in my bedroom. A front door I cannot use. AGH!!!!!

I am hungry. I am at work. I forgot to bring stuff. Oops.

Mother Effer .... here we go again!

OK ... so the latest from "Big Brother" ....

Now I get to hang out with "bossman" every freaking 3rd Friday so he can see what I do in the field (I freaking work, dumbass).

Not THAT big of a deal ... I will do it. My beef? Did he ASK me about my schedule ... did he TALK with me? NOPE. He made his decision and then TOLD me.

Of course, I look at my calendar for the next few months and every 3rd Friday was the day I chose as a day for a pediatrician appointment, an admin day, Cubs tickets (ie I work half, take half off) .....

In the meantime the Army has allowed E to work from home. He has the effing audacity to call me, while I am in the office, the day after I told him how disgruntled I am at work, to tell me how much he LOVES working from home ... blah, blah, blah. WTF ever.

Shit. I hate my job.

(OK ... its Holy Week ... and once again, my potty mouth rears its ugly head when I talk about my stinkin job. oops.)

The "windy" City

We have a grand example of our government at work, here in Chicago.
The fat head mayor Daley (who thinks he is an important piece of the puzzle in the nation ... when in reality he is a mere speck) wants the Olympics here in Chicago in 2012. I think he is nuts; but that isn't my issue.
The City cops (whom I work with on almost a daily basis) have been trying to sign a contract with the City for 2 years now. These cops are the same people who protect us every day. Are there some bad seeds? Sure. But, overall, they work hard trying to keep a big City sane.
While Daley and his comrades have all gotten 6% raises in this economy, the CPD (and the CFD) have gotten nothing. They have also now been told that they won't, because of this economy.
OK ... but, Daley wants them to work even HARDER in 4 years when the Olympics could be here? Daley is also hiring in PRIVATE security for the Games as well? What an effing slap in the face!
So ... the IOC is here today and the Fraternal Order of Police and have decided to use today to hold a protest at City Hall.
Good for them. They have been given the shaft from quite some time - a nasty politician (not a former cop) was appointed their Chief (and inept one at best). They have no contract. They get retro pays every few years, which screws them every time with their taxes.
Where are our stinkin priorities? Who are more important: councilmen ... or the men who defend them?

Are we "back to normal" yet?

So, I haven't really "blogged" on a while ... life, as I know it, as been in complete chaos.

E returned on March 18. My parents got here on March 19. Little j's party was on March 21. The squabbling between my husband and my Mom ensued on March 22. My parents left on March 23. I went back to work on March 24 and I haven't blinked since.

The boys are nuts since E came home. Sleeping schedules are off. Manners are gone. Quiet nights and routines? Out the window.

And E? Shoot ... he still lives in his own world, with a bit of us thrown in. Its like living with a 3rd child, seriously, it is!

Everything that we put off for the 14 months that he was gone, suddenly has to be done. NOW. Handy men, HVAC men, furniture stores. I haven't been able to catch a breath, but our calendar is booked and the checkbook is getting thin.

I thought I would be calmer once he returned. I thought I might be able to "get stuff done" when he returned. Life is still the same for me ... with more added on the plate.

WTF?

Season of Discontent

OK - we all know how much I hate my job. I seriously hate my job.

Lately though - it is getting worse. The boss - sucks ... honestly, he is a jag-bag. Totally a thoughtless ass-hole (pardon my French).

I wake up with absolutely NO motivation to get the job done .... which isn't good. I have to work. I need the paycheck. And, really, I am not a bad worker.

Wish the economy wasn't where it is ... finding a way out seems to be like trying to find the eye of a needle in the darkness!

Oh well .... I will continue to take the shit, play the game and pray for a way out.

35 candles . . .

One year older ... I don't feel it.

Sometimes I miss the big deal that birthdays were. You know, the parties, presents, UPS deliveries. Being the center of attention for a day or two.

I remember some of my favorite birthdays. My 13th - my first boy/girl party. My 16th - my surprise party. My 17th - a special night with my high school sweetheart. My 21st - wait. I don't remember that one ;)My 30th - another great surprise.

Instead of UPS trucks and parties, I got to sit in the office all day. But ... I got a slobbery kiss from Big J this morning ... and a smile from Little j.

We will celebrate tonight with Taco Tuesday.

Happy Birthday to me. ;)

Orwellian?

So ... the latest work scheme ... Now create a calendar within our lotus Notes (of course we don't use Outlook b/c we aren't normal like anyone else) ... a calendar so that anyone (ahem: the boss, the boss's boss, the boss's boss's boss...) can check on where we are, when, for how long, why .... A calendar ON TOP OF a weekly report we have to send in every Friday showing where we were, who we saw and what we did ... A calendar ON TOP OF the weekly report ON TOP OF the production report we have to send in every week to show what $ we brought in ...

The topper? We are already out of the field once a week while we sit in the office and take phone calls. We have been told by the boss that if our numbers aren't at 100% of goal (mine haven't been in over a year) that we shouldn't be taking a day to do any administration work, meaning, do it on your own time.

WTF? Yeah ... um ... no. MY time is precisely that ... MY TIME. I do not make 6 figures, no where even close. I have no desire or need to do anything outside of my work hours.

I hate my job.

What comes next ... show us what you do in between time? Um, how many times do you pee on company time?

How about cameras on our rear view mirrors to show how much work we get done while we are in the car?

Maybe GPS tracking devices on our computers (I wouldn't hesitate to think that this has already been done)?

Did I mention I hate my job?

Yummies

Saw this on a friend of a friend's board and it made me think ...

Here are 5 of my favorite store-bought/ boxed cookies:
1. Oreos
2. Girl Scout Samoas
3. Nutter Butters
4. Archway Sugar Cookies (they no longer make em :( )
5. Chips Ahoy Softbake Chocolate Chip

And while we are at it ...

5 of my favorite ice creams:
1. Edy's Girl Scout Samoa
2. Ben and Jerry's Cherry Gracia
3. Ben and Jerry's Cookie Dough
4. Edy's French Silk
5. Edy's Peanut Butter Cup

5 of my favorite salty snacks:
1. Cool Ranch Doritos
2. Sea Salt and Black Pepper Popcorn (Holy Crap - this is awesome stuff!)
3. Fritos
4. Sour Cream and Cheddar Ruffles
5. Archer Farms Maui Onion Potato Chips

5 of my favorite frozen items:
1. Lean Cuisine Chicken Ranch Flatbread Wrap
2. Lean Cuisine Roasted Vegetable Pizza
3. CPK Jerk Chicken Pizza
4. Krusteaz mini pancakes
5. Skinny Cow Ice Cream sandwiches

5 of my favorite cereals:
1. Grape Nuts Trail Mix
2. Golden Grahams
3. Multi-Grain Cheerios
4. Frosted Flakes
5. Cinnamon Toast Crunch

Hungry

OMG ... I have been hungry all day ... Not just "oh, drink some water and your hunger will disappear" hungry ... but the "what else can I pull out of the deep hidden corners of my pantry" hungry.

So helpful on my never ending quest to lose pounds (which, as of now, is still ZERO!) ....

Mommy is chunky ... still

Another day started, another day that I feel like I weigh 300 pounds. I can honestly tell you that I am starting to hit my breaking point with the battle this time.
I know in my life that my "battle" with weight will always be a "war." .... a constant situation that I have to deal with on an ongoing basis. I have been dealing with it since I was 8. Never obese - but always - fat. I have had my periods of "prettiness" - but, somehow I go through something in my life that ends those eras (ie, babies, college, etc). This time, I am starting to wonder ... WTF????
I am working out more than I have since before the baby .... I am watching what I eat, no food after dinner (that was/is one of my weaknesses), I am CONSTANTLY on the go... what more do I have to do?
The doctor did every test imaginable on me - tested my heart, blood, hormones ... all FINE. Not even BORDERLINE ... but FINE. So ... it isn't anything that I can "cure."
I KNOW that I don't have a steady workout routine at this moment, what single Mom does? But, come on. This is stupid.
The doctor did say to give it 3 months and then she would take another course of action ... well, that will bring me to April 1 .... if I STILL haven't lost a pound by then I am heading straight back there and figuring this shit out.
Seriously - am I doomed to be the fat Mom for the rest of my life?????